Thinking about things

Lately I've been contemplating some major changes.

The first is going back to work. Well, not going back to the same job I had pre-Jacob, but getting a job of some sort. My reasons for this are varied, but I felt it becoming less of an option and more of an necessity as Mayor Nutter announced last week that he would be slashing Police overtime (and, in effect, our family budget.) I haven't had a real job in about 10 years, and I'm scared nobody will want to hire me. But I'm also somewhat thrilled at the idea of having (non-gym or doctor's appointment-related) time out of the house. Not to mention my own money!

Then there's the possibility of putting Jacob in school. Not because I'd be working -- obviously I could plan my schedule to accomodate homeschooling -- but because I fear that he's falling behind in some ways that I just can't make up for here at home. And I also have begun feeling like homeschooling -- for our family -- is better in theory than in practice.

As far as trying for that next baby, well, it's still going on, though I seem to have lost my enthusiasm for it for the time being. I'm starting to feel like maybe it's time to take a break. Unfortunately, at my age with all my challenges, that means I may be closing the door forever on the possibility of another biological child, which is why the decision is difficult. But it's just how I feel right now -- we've been trying forever (7 years feels like forever, anyhow), and it's like beating my head against a wall.

Change is hard. But I've changed a lot over the past year and a half or so, and anything's possible. Wish me luck...

VOTE!

Please take the time today to get out and vote! I'll be on my way to the polls as soon as I finish my breakfast. I've never been so excited and hopeful about an election!